No, I don't feel bad...

...that my boyfriend and I split an X-Large pizza and I ate more than him.
...that I jammed out to Miley Cyrus' "Party in the USA" on my way home from work.
...that I didn't workout yesterday.
...that I did that (shall remain nameless).
...that I boxed dyed my hair the last two times I changed my color.
...that I'm sometimes too tired to brush my teeth before bed.
...that I tattled on the person above me in the apartments for having a dog (illegally) that barked all day (annoyingly)
...that I wore your shirt to make guacamole and ruined it.
...that I told you I made a fat-free chicken wing dip when it was probably the biggest calorie bomb out there.
...that I got an overpriced t-shirt at the John Legend concert.
...that I ate an entire batch of brownies in two days.
...that I called you out on going to the strip club.